by: Anonymous
It is often the bully-the antagonist- who is blamed for his actions, but the underlying reasons which lead to the act itself are often ignored. So, what causes someone to cause another pain? What causes a kid like you and me to drive someone to hate themselves? The answer is simple.
Violence begets violence; Chaos begets pain; Trauma begets violence; Thus, begins the vicious circle;
This never-ending cycle has been evident in several other cases as well. For example, Ted Bundy, the notorious American serial killer, had a strained childhood. Being brought up by his grandparents, Bundy regularly witnessed his grandfather, who he had idolised, mercilessly beating his wife. Violence begets violence. That act of violence caused him to inflict that pain, that suffering on to numerous young women. And that pain, that trauma passed on to the families of those victims.
So, how does a child in his formative years react to violence? By inflicting that on to others. Bullies make their victims feel helpless, worthless, and basically exactly what they are themselves feeling. Be it physical or emotional violence, the consequence remains the same. According to Bullying Statistics 2010, 54% of students who witness violence and physical abuse at home are likely to become bullies at school. That is over half! Half of the kids who have witnessed such toxicity in their life are susceptible to put that same toxicity in its most magnified form. Ripping people off of their self image, bullies inflict their inner pain onto the most likely prey. I suspect that there could be two possible reasons for such an outrageous reaction. One, they have no outlet to express what they are feeling and they can see no other part to get rid of the misery inflicted upon them. Second, witnessing their parents or other authoritative figures indulge in abusive behaviour, children think that it is acceptable to do the same to their peers.
Antagonising kids or “bullies” is not the solution. To save the life of one kid we cannot afford to sacrifice another because that just feeds the viscous circle. Children inflict pain, suffering and trauma onto others because they feel helpless, incapable of getting out of the situation. Not because they were born evil or because they were monsters. After all, all monsters are human.